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    Greg

    Ray, I have a question. Is it possible to begin the breakout novel WITHOUT a first page dripping in tension? Let’s face it, not all stories do or should begin with a high-speed chase and shots fired. In other words, can one successfully start the story just drifting down the river rather than going over the falls? And if so, is there a key element to focus on other than tension?

    You asked in a recent flogging, “Is voice enough?” Well, is it?

    Norm

    And, thank you for giving us the space to "do it" Ray.

    Ray Rhamey

    Greg, I can give you a definite maybe in answer to your questions. In other words, it all depends. However, if you can raise a story question on the first page, why not do that? The more you do this thing, the more you understand that nothing you've written is sacred. If you can put tension, or create a compelling story question, why on earth would you not do that?

    I suggest you submit your opening for a flogging and see what folks think.

    Thanks for the question.

    Greg

    Thanks so much for the reply, Ray. Have done so. I’m sure we’ll be talking again in a few weeks.

    However, here’s something to think about in the interim: the story of the sinking of the Titanic did not begin with, “Iceberg ahead! Left full rudder!”

    In fact it began with, “Tickets, please.”

    Not trying to be difficult, just wondering how you start if the iceberg is a long way off and everyone thinks the ship is unsinkable.

    Ray Rhamey

    Greg. The story of the sinking of the Titanic isn't the story of a ship hitting an iceberg, it's the story of the people involved. If the "ticket, please" was spoken to a character who desperately needed to get to America but didn't have the fare, then you'd have a beginning with tension--what's going to happen to the person, how will they get the ticket they need so badly?

    Kelley

    I think voice is enough if you're really, really lucky. Heck, nothing is enough if you're that lucky.

    Take Twilight for example. For a book that became such a huge phenomenon, you'd think it was a work of genius. But it's not. I'll admit I read it, and I liked it, and so did my mom, my husband, my sister's boyfriend, my cousins, my aunt. And none of us know why we liked it. Read the first 16 lines of the first chapter on Amazon. Not the prologue, because I doubt that was there in the first manuscript. To me, there is nothing special in those first 16 lines.

    But I don't have Stephenie Meyer's luck. The only luck I have is bad luck. So I'm going to work to get my story started the best way I can and hope someday my work will pay off. :)

    David Greer

    Consider the second definition of compel--"to urge irresistibly" in the context of the first sentence of Camus's The Stranger: "Mother died today." Not, "My mother died today," or "My mother passed away today," but just those three stark words, which not only characterize the detached protagonist, Meursault, but also the tenor of the book. How about Orwell's 1984? "It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen." Or, my favorite (though it's actually three sentences): "It was love at first sight. The first time Yossarian saw the chaplain he fell madly in love with him. Yossarian was in the hospital with a pain in his liver that fell just short of being jaundice." All of these openers urged me, irresistibly, to continue to read. You can find more first lines here http://www.pubquizhelp.com/art/book_first_lines.html and scattered throughout cyberspace.

    Jami Gold

    Greg,

    I'd like to emphasize that conflict and tension don't necessarily mean car chases or big action scenes.

    Tension is created by a gap. A gap between what a character wants and what they have. A gap between the direction the action is currently going ("It was a sunny, lazy Sunday.") and where foreshadowing tells us it's going to really go ("But thunderclouds loomed on the horizon."). A gap between what character A wants compared to character B.

    Any gap creates story questions: How will the character get what they want, how will the impending thunderstorm affect those picnickers, how will those characters clash? It doesn't have to be a big James Bond movie opening, but it does have to create questions to give the reader a reason to turn the page.

    Greg

    Jami, thanks. Believe me, I understand what you, Ray, and others are saying. And I don’t disagree. I’m simply struggling with a first page that involves a scene that I believe is the right place for the story to begin. Yet, there is no tension to speak of, as the MC, at that point, doesn’t know what’s coming. So, there is no “gap” as you put it, because the gap doesn’t exist yet. And I am resolute in my resistance to artificially creating some manner of tension that has little, if anything, to do with the story just to get somebody to turn the page.

    The problem is bedeviling me. Ray will be flogging (I think) a couple of optional openings in a week or two. At this juncture, I’m inclined to just wait and see.

    Jami Gold

    Greg,

    Ah... The "real world" dilemma. :) Okay, think about what the MC will be fighting for later on in the story. Think about the general theme of the story and how that relates to the MC's current situation and later situation.

    Now, see if you can add some foreshadowing to give a hint of that problem.

    For example, say your MC is a happily-married family guy and you want to show that in the first scene. But maybe the story is about various threats to that existence (whether of the Fatal Attraction or attacking aliens variety - or anything in between). Then you could slip in a line about how much it would devastate him to lose his family.

    The next key part is to *not* have the character dismiss those worries ("He laughed off the ridiculous thought."). If the character blows something off, so will the reader - undermining your tension.

    Does that help?

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